It occurs to me that each year that the goals or resolutions I struggle (or fail) with keeping are the ones I never wanted to do in the first place. They are the accomplishments or actions I have seen in others that I admire and so I want to admire them in myself as well. It seems their lives run smoother, they are more balanced, more healthy, happy, etc…. and it’s because of what I ‘see’ them doing in their life. So if I do that too, I will also have the successful life I think they have. So I start analyzing and identifying what I need to do in my life that will accomplish those valuable things for me.
But what I am not considering in this thinking is that each of us is different and our lives are all balanced in different ways. Sure, we have some of these things in common, but ultimately we are each unique individuals with a unique set of needs. For me this is what makes it hard to really understand and accept myself. It is much easier for me to listen to someone sharing with me what makes them angry, hurt, ashamed, or happy, loved, appreciated. They have already identified the issues and are just seeking counsel on what to do about them.
But how do I look inside and identify what MY needs are? As soon as I can identify my unique ‘list of ingredients’ that fulfills my life, I can then see what I need to change. This is the clear path to setting goals I can actually keep and that will build me up instead of setting me up for disappointment in myself and my life.
to be continued.....